The challenges seem to be getting harder. Not from a doing standpoint, but from a finding-the-opportunity standpoint. So my homework is piling up since I'm not finding the opportunities to do them.
Here are my outstanding assignments:
Day 3: Let FireMan know that I appreciate his kindness & consideration towards me. I swear I'm looking for this. I'm not seeing it. Another option they provide is gently telling your husband that you need more kindess & consideration from him. I've considered this, but am concerned that no matter how I say it he'll take it as some sort of nagging. So I'm really hoping he'll do something that I can count as kind & considerate.
Day 4: Let your husband know how much you appreciate the work he does. I guess I could just come out & say it, but I'm afraid if we're not talking about work or something, it'll seem... forced. And I want it to seem genuine, because it is.
Day 5 (today's assignment): tell a relative (his or yours) how much you love, respect, and support your husband. How do you do that unless you're already talking about him? Am I supposed to call his mom out of the blue and say "I just wanted you to know how much I love your son"? Call up my dad and say "did you know that I support FireMan no matter what"? I guess I'm just struggling with timing.
The past couple of days I've done pretty well with the no-negative-talking thing. It's getting easier. Most of the time. I have discovered one side effect though: our sex life suffers.
Take last night for instance. I sought his advice regarding something small, but something small that I'm worried about. He refused. Said he didn't want to think about it. I persisted. He resisted. Then he tries to make a move. I was pretty upset with him by that point, shoved him off of me, rolled over & went to sleep.
Now, in the past, I would have said something negative to him, we'd get into a mini-argument, but most of the time we'd get it all out and move on to getting it on. Now that I can't say what I want to him? I don't say anything. I roll over & go to sleep. And so... our sex life suffers. Just an example.
For now I'm counting that as a minor casualty on the road to healing our relationship. And that once healed, I'm guessing our sex life will be better than ever.
"Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers." -- Ephesians 4:29